Tuesday, May 17, 2016

YOU CAN BE A MINION TOO! & Steak & GoT & So much more.

I was going to write this blog post last week. Then I caught Ebola and lost 6 days of my life. I seriously don't remember them. I had a doctor's appointment on Day 1 of the hellacious virus that nearly claimed my sanity, purely by accident (I'd made the appointment two months earlier) and the Doc said "Oh its just a little virus, rest and fluids and you'll be fine."

My ass.

I vaguely remember Steven and the kid coming upstairs one day to check on me, and them bringing it to my attention that it had been 11 hours since they'd seen me last. One morning I woke up and actually got lost in my bathroom. While we do have a fairly spacious double lavatory, you can still see the entire room from any vantage point. It took me 10 minutes to find my way back to the bed.
I did not know you could spell Diarrhoea that way. It checks out.

I called into work for the first time in well over a year. In the end though, I survived. While I was at the Doc's I had the host of blood work done that every person closer to 40 than they are 20, needs to have done. Terms like cholesterol, triglycerides, diabetes, thyroid and closer evaluations of abnormalities are thrown around. I haven't received the results yet, but I'm pretty sure if death were imminent they would have called sooner rather than later so I must be mostly okay.

Anyway, you didn't come here to read my whining. I'll start with the really exciting Minion Stuff.

Bill Philips. The other confirmed Minion. Just had a 6th place finish in a circuit event in NOLA.
All around good guy. I expect him to finish second in the Main this year.

Monk announced in his blog today that the first two Minions are Bill Philips and Steven. Which you already knew, because you read my blog. Granted, I was a bit premature in putting it all out there but now that everyone is on the same page, consider it "official news". His goal is to put 5 Minions into the Main Event this year. (For those just tuning in, Will "Poker Monkey" Souther runs an investment group every year that puts together a dream team of would-be World Champion Poker Players and stakes them for the full $10,000 buy-in into the WSOP Main Event. Anyone can invest by purchasing "shares". Each share is $200, and for the $200 you get a piece of all the runners. Then from the winnings, the 10K buy in is deducted first and refunded to investors, 35% goes to the player and 65% is split evenly among all investors. It is hands down the most creative and equitable staking opportunity you'll find. Why back one horse when you can own 5 lottery tickets?). Anyway, the pool is nearly at 3 seats already purchased by investors and the rest will come along as excitement builds for the WSOP.

Master of Ceremonies himself, one time Minion, the Hugh Hefner of Biloxi, MS, propagator of many things contagious - Kai Landry.
More than a few times while chatting, Monk has shared his distress over choosing the third runner. He's had multiple qualified candidates from a variety of backgrounds apply. He has a short list of personal favorites, but hasn't quite made the final selection. So Seat #3 is going to be a Wild Card. Which means YOU can win it. The gloriously coifed, semi-famous and entirely salacious Kai Landry has agreed to host a poker tournament at his home in Biloxi. The real deal with professional dealers, cocktail waitresses, the whole nine. He'll even wear his velvety smoking jacket. It's a legitimate event. The buy-in is $400. Two shares in the minion pool. If you win the tournament, you get the third Minion seat and the same deal as the others runners. If you lose, you still have two shares of investment this summer and may turn a profit regardless.
Today I learned what a Merkin is. Apparently, I am the last person to know.
These may be part of the goodie bags for the coveted Minion event.
At the very least, expect an application demonstration. 

This is way better than a typical satellite because the field will almost certainly be small. Maybe less than 20 small. Maybe less than 10. Kai's lavish abode, "Lord Puddingsworth's Manor" as he calls it, isn't exactly in downtown Los Angeles. But it IS within walking distance to the Beau Rivage Casino Resort in Biloxi, MS. And plane tickets from Vegas to NOLA are as cheap as $70 bucks round trip. If you're willing to fly Spirit or Frontier. Which is pretty much the equivalent of a flying greyhound bus. But that's another blog. My point is.. if you can make it happen, you should make it happen. You can put up just a few hundred dollars and play for life changing money. Plus, the last time Kai hosted a poker tournament, the champion streaked naked around the neighborhood with his trophy in tow. Also another blog post. For more information or to inquire about dates, click on over to Monk's blog here. Or just hit him up on Facebook. Or message me and I'll point you in the right direction. Or if you just want to grab a few shares while they're still for sale, let him know. He usually stops selling shortly after the series gets going.
This is a perfect steak.

Next order of business. I promised in the last blog to give the new Steakhouse "Alder & Birch" a mention. Now this is the part where I'm going to lose some of you: It's in "The Orleans" casino. I know. Not exactly synonymous with fine dining. Actually, it conjures up more of an "oxygen tank & motorized scooter vibe". But this small, elegant pearl is tucked away in a corner almost begging to be overlooked by the typical Orleans clientele. We were nearly forced to try it the first time. I received a $100 dinner comp and we were already planning to play a tournament there so we figured we'd find something close to edible to burn the comp on. What followed was hands down the best steakhouse experience we've had in Vegas.
A shocking delight - a watermelon and goat cheese salad.
Don't knock it till you try it.
The ambience is contemporary without being pretentious. The menu is straight forward and reasonably priced. (An 8 ounce filet is $28. A la carte side dishes average $7). Literally everything we tasted was prepared simply and elegantly. I can't speak to the wine menu, as I'm not nearly as educated in wine as I should be. It was varied and lengthy. I can say that we returned without a comp just two weeks after our first visit and plan to make it our "occasions" venue when we want something a little nicer than the norm. I HIGHLY suggest trying this steakhouse before they inevitably become dated and less attentive to every detail. Which I truly hope is never the case for this exceptional gem.
This speaks for itself.
Onward to Game of Thrones. Sunday is the highlight of my week right now, but I'm already emotionally distraught that we only have six episodes left. I am fearful of saying too much and ruining someone else's experience as they catch up.. but I am curious as to who you all think might get the axe this season? Because we know we aren't going to get through 10 episodes without losing someone near and dear. I have never enjoyed a show as much as I enjoy this one. It is expertly written and masterfully devastating.

I am dangerously teetering on this becoming a novel, so I'll just give a quick update about Steven's progress towards becoming a World Champion. I'll give a more in depth report in the next update. He has been religiously studying Jonathan Little's online coaching opportunities through "Float the Turn". He watches videos, take notes, reads articles, adds to notes, rinse repeat. I'm not really sure what he's doing over there because I'm busy binge watching all 32 seasons of Survivor (don't judge me) and teaching the kid how to put on pants. But he's working hard. He's dedicated. I'm impressed. I expected him to take it seriously, but he's really interested in learning what he can. Today he went and played the 12 pm tournament at The Orleans and made great efforts to apply some of the methodology he's been working on. He was able to identify some specific leaks and put into effect some of what he's already learned to strengthen his game. He chopped three ways and gave himself a good morale boost to get back to the books.

That's it for now. I'm off to Tribal Council.


  1. I find it amazing you are binge watching Survivor. I love that show. Every season, my wife and I marvel about how it remains fresh. Do you already know who won the earlier seasons? I'd imagine if you did, it would ruin the experience. Regardless, enjoy!

  2. I guess I am not alone in being a Survivor fan. Amazing how this has gone on and on.

  3. Some of the shows I've binge watched (not Survivor) do not have great plots (they run out of ideas ?). But they have interesting characters that keep you coming back.

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